Prejudice against single mothers should not dictate housing policy

Prejudice against single mothers should not dictate housing policy
Kimberly Gold

July 8, at the Colorado Springs City Council meeting, I witnessed something that rocked me to my core. During the public comment period about a proposed affordable housing development at Sand Creek - near North Carefree Circle and Peterson Road - a member of the public stood and delivered a sweeping, discriminatory commentary of single mothers.

He claimed that households headed by single moms "demonstrably produce the majority of social ills in our society today, like crime, delinquency, educational failure, drug addiction, and sexual confusion." According to him, the problem isn't financial hardship or lack of opportunity - it's the absence of a father.

He went on to say, "We don't want the crime and attendant social ills that plague fatherless households" in his neighborhood. He cited data from various sources, including the Census Bureau and nonprofit organizations, and offered to share it with the Council.

Well, I am very interested in seeing that data. Please send it to every member of the City Council at allcouncil@coloradosprings.gov. But I also hope he's ready to hear from the many residents of this city whose lived experience tells a very different story.

While that man spoke, I received a quiet text from someone in the audience. It read: "I'm a single mom. My son is now an officer in the Air Force." She didn't mention the long hours she worked or the sacrifices she made to help her son reach his goals. She didn't say that her son is now serving and protecting people, including the speaker who just said neither of them was welcome in his neighborhood.

That kind of prejudice has no place in our public discourse or public policy.

That kind of prejudice has no place in our public discourse or public policy.

Colorado Springs is a city that celebrates its diversity in race, religion, background, and family structure. To target an entire group of residents in a public forum because they don't fit a narrow definition of family is unacceptable. It's offensive, harmful, and fundamentally un-American.

I know this from experience. I am a single mom, and I was raised by one.

My mother was a Korean immigrant and a soldier in the U.S. Army. She became the first Korean woman to reach the rank of Chief Warrant Officer 5. She joined in the 1980s, served for 32 years, and taught me to turn every obstacle into an opportunity. Because of her strength and example, I've been able to serve this city as your elected representative.

I didn't choose to become a single parent. I left an abusive relationship to protect myself and my child. Like so many others, I've struggled with limited resources, lack of time, and few support systems. But I kept going - like so many single moms across this city and country do every day - not because it was easy, but because we love our children and believe in their futures.

We need to stop putting scarlet letters on people and isolating them from the community just because they look different, worship differently, live differently, or because they don't have a spouse. Stigma and exclusion have no place in a city that claims to care about its neighbors. We need to step up for everyone.

This isn't just a debate about housing policy. This is a reflection of our community's values. Are we a city that turns its back on families facing challenges, or one that recognizes resilience, extends support, and makes room for every neighbor willing to work hard and contribute?

If we are truly concerned about crime and instability, then we must address the root causes: poverty, lack of opportunity, and lack of affordable housing. That means investing in safe places to live - yes, even near and in your neighborhood - especially for those who need it most, like single mothers.

This is about more than buildings. It's about whether we choose compassion or condemnation, inclusion or isolation. I choose compassion. I hope you do, too.