Wisdom of the ancients
A friend of mine once explained the aging process - he knew, because he was almost 85, and I was a sprightly young fellow in my early fifties.
"At 50, you don't pay attention to aging, unless you've got some kind of age-related problem. But you're still old - women in their thirties won't date you, you're probably not rich and never will be, and your hair is turning gray. And no matter what you do, you get older, worse-looking, and probably gloomier."
I asked him if he thought about dying.
"Nope! Why bother - it'll come when it comes!"
Absent a visit from the grim reaper, I'll be partying on my 85th birthday on Nov. 5 with my fabulous spouse, children, grandchildren, great-grands, old friends and new - but we need to start early! Cranky old geezers start fading away in the early evening, so let's pop open the champagne before sunset.
So what's on the agenda for the next few years? I have no plans, no expectations, no trips that I want to take, no foreign countries I yearn to visit, no famous people I want to meet, no cool things I want to buy. Absent a bucket list, does that mean that I'll sit on the porch, stare vacantly at the mountains and wait for the day to end?
No! It's time to continue the party, not shut it down and wait for blackness.
Adventures? I've had more than my share, including climbing most of our 14'ers, sailing around the world in a creaky wooden ketch, running marathons, riding my bike on the Copper Triangle, smuggling dope from Colombia and Jamaica to Florida and Connecticut and crossing swords with Douglas Bruce in the 90s.
And now? Friends, family, memories and always dogs. We have three: Bella (a two-year-old Bernedoodle), Lily (a three-year-old Aussidoodle) and Emmett (a four-year-old Chesapeake Bay Retriever).
The dogs are playful, energetic, needy, loving and sometimes difficult. We're dog lovers - always have been, always will be.
Friends, family, memories, dogs and a loving partner … what else do we geezers need? Here are some "Happiness Increasers."
Fewer screens. YouTube, Instagram, Facebook and thousands of lesser offerings are always ready to distract, amuse, mislead and misdirect the unwary. Pick up a book and engage your mind. On my desk now: "A Treasury of Short Stories," published in 1947. It includes Hemingway's masterpiece "The Snows of Kilimanjaro," as well as works by less heralded writers such as Oliver Onions.
Less Amazon, more shopping. Big box, or small shop - it's better for you to engage with actual humans in a store rather than give Jeff and Lauren more money.
Community engagement. Volunteer, volunteer and volunteer some more. There are scores of worthy nonprofits that rely on unpaid volunteers, and after decades in the workplace, we geezers usually have some useful skills.
Walking and running. Some of us can still stride purposefully, some hobble and shuffle and some of us need a walker. Speed, strength, distance - doesn't matter. A block or two, a mile or more. Whatever you can do is fine.
Hanging out with the very young, the very old and everyone in between. I love it when our rickety old house is filled for a while with the delighted squeals of our great-grands or the reflective quiet of my fellow octogenarians.
And finally, what happened to my 85-year-old friend of 30 years ago?
He eventually moved into an assisted living facility close to one of his kids in the Midwest, and died at 91.
We should all be so lucky!
